What shall we do with the ill-advised change to a popular song?

I was heartily tickled yesterday to read on the BBC http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/education/7860869.stm that Bookstart have got themselves into hotwater by changing the words to 'What shall we do with the drunken sailor?'. While I'm all for Bookstart as an idea - give a free book or two to harrassed parents of young children and it will encourage them to read to them - they seem a bit heavy handed. And I have to say that the books they gave to our three over a period of 4 years were of such woeful quality that they ended up in the charity box very quickly indeed. But then, we were reading anyway. Anything that encourages more people to read must be good I suppose.



But back to the drunken sailor. Bookstart's excuse that the reason it's now 'what shall we do with the grumpy pirate?' (I kid you not) was so that it fitted with pirate-themed reading events is SO pat and SO well practiced and SO disingenuous that it's probably true. It was just a very stupid thing to do. Like Baa Baa [insert culturally-appropriate fully-inclusive ovine-related colour choice here] Sheep, the song about the marine operative who's had a trifle too much pop is known at a subconscious level by most of the population, who do not take kindly to having the childhood props kicked out from under them. The problem is that every now and then, someone does an ernest survey that proves only 20% of parents can remember any nursery rhymes; and certainly, put on the spot by someone on the doorstep or the telephone while my child cries / wants their nose wiped / howls for a drink / destroys the living room, I'd be pushed to recite any correctly too. They're asking the wrong question.



The question isn't "can you remember any nursery rhymes?", it's "what did Little Miss Muffet sit on?" or "how many blind mice were there?". To gauge what people know in their soul you listen to what they sing when they're drunk, not what they recite at speech day.



I admit, I have a soft spot for the drunken sailor and the perennial problem of what to do with him. When Eldest was being induced (badly) and I was on the Gas-And-Air after 36 hours without sleep or food, I apparently sang all the verses I knew, then treated my husband and the midwife to a disquisition on the importance of the song as a social barometer. I rest my case.



Anyway, if you're running a pirate-themed event and do not wish to mention intoxication to the children, what's wrong with this ?http://lair2000.net/Mermaid_Lyrics4/lyrics/You_Are_A_Pirate.html